This post is brought to you by brandmile (India's most exclusive shoppping club) and my general hatred towards fashion and anything related. You know brandmile is awesome by all the lower case letters and the extra ‘p’ in ‘shopping’. I’m not kidding, google it now and check.
#5 : Stop Child abuse
Recently, there was a thing going on in Facebook, where they asked everyone to change their display pic to that of a cartoon for a week. As gay as this sounds, I too, took part. Only recently did I find out that this was some elaborate scheme to stop child violence. Here’s the proof for those who didn’t know.
This doesn’t sound naive and pointless at all. I’m sure all those child abusers out there tremble at the power of the facebook display pic. If nothing, everyone is ‘aware’ of the child abuse problem only after putting a cartoon as your display pic. So I’m thinking, why stop there? Don’t just put up display pics of your favourite toons, dress like them. Now the already trembling child abusers will be on the knees begging for forgiveness from the costumed kids/freaks. Only way this can backfire is if those abusers like fantasising and roleplay!
#4 : Women’s T-Shirts with the cute captions
I’m all for equality, but girls who wear “Hottie” and “You say I’m a bitch like it’s a bad thing” are just a dark alley away from achieving their goals. But who am I to stop the women’s liberation, I just meant that the message should be clearer than those convoluted pretend-cutsey tees.
#3 : REALLY low rider jeans
Low rider jeans was the greatest invention before the sliced bread. Everyone enjoys looking at most of your underwear and get a sneak at your ass crack. But now fashion needs to grow and this trend needs a major modification, like maybe pulling your pants down, ALL the way.
Ø Global warming can’t affect you, the air circulation is just too good
Ø You don’t need to wait that extra few seconds when going to the bathroom
Ø People won’t be so conscious about their shoes anymore
Ø Walking is a difficulty, so is running(esp important when being chased by rapists)
#2 : Clowning all the way
Women like to do their job and make men laugh and/or have sex with them. That is why they put on so much make up, to look like clowns and/or prostitutes that cater exclusively to clowns. To add to the sex appeal, put on big red rubber noses, which doubles for safe clown sex (RUBBER noses).
#1 : She-Fe-Male
A woman who dresses like a man is SEXY has hell. A man who dresses like a woman is... FASHION. If you were going to say ‘Gay’ or ‘Transvestite’ then you are a hindrance to progress, of fashion. Eventually all men should have bleached white skins, no facial hair, pretty pink shirts, nail polish, high heels and the ability to bear children! HA! Take that Harley Davidson, Metallica and anything that’s manly!