Dawwg : Sup y’all! This is T Dawwg, with 2 Ws. I’m back with another interview but this time not with a sociopath, but with a dude who just finished one year in his IT company yesterday. Congratulations anniversary dude!
Anniversary Dude : No way I’m having such a long name!
AD : That’s better!
Dawwg : So tell me mah man, how did it feel like when you completed one year as an IT professional?
AD : It felt like I completed one year as an IT professional, what did you expect me to say? It feels ‘wet’?
Dawwg : uuuuuhh.......
Censor meter : Warning! Yellow alert! Yellow alert!
Dawwg : Ahem...so what made da biggest impact on you during the days of your training?
AD : When I was hit by a moving cycle.
Dawwg : When yo?
AD : When I staring at a girl wearing short shorts standing in the middle of the road.
Censor meter : Warning! Yellow alert! Yellow alert!
Dawwg : So where did you have your ha-ppi-est moment while in training?
AD : Like most people, in the multiplex.
Dawwg : The occasion?
AD : When Drona was over.
Dawwg : Do you miss the feel of your training days?
AD : Not really, I still got exams and I still flunk in most of them so ‘the feel’ is still pretty much there.
Dawwg : What is the one thing in life the past one year?
AD : Live
Dawwg : You paint a grim picture man!
AD : And you ask several stupid questions but do I complain?
Dawwg : So how did you end up here, exactly one year ago?
AD : I was actually an inventor. I invented pockets but only later realised it was already invented. So I went for plan B which was to join this company in case my invention fails.
Dawwg : So that is how you got here huh?
AD : No, I got ‘here’ by walking through that door back there.
Dawwg : I’m tired of this sh*t! How about we spice things up a notch with the question?
AD : Is that supposed to intimidate me or impress me, because I just feel bored.
Dawwg : Tell me about your relationships huh?
AD : Well, there was this one great girl, she was sweet and friendly, at the same time sexy looking! The chemistry was undeniable...
Dawwg : Alrite! My boy’s in da game eh!
AD : I meant between the girl and her fiancé. They get married next year by the way.
Dawwg : Tough luck man! I’m sure you will....
AD : ....kill someone just because I’m bored?
Apt Meter : Warning! Warning! Orange alert! Orange alert! Orange alert!
Dawwg : ...........
AD : ..............
Dawwg : .......find someone else.
AD : I already did.
Dawwg : Really?
AD : Of course not idiot! Do I look depressed to you? I’m single!
Dawwg : Are you advertising in my interview?
AD : Oh god! Please don’t tell me you are interested!
Apt Meter : Warning! Warning! Orange alert! Orange alert! Orange alert!
Dawwg : So this is what you’ve become? After one year you are a bitter sarcastic shell of a man.
AD : With hints of God complex.
Dawwg : Is there anything else you’d like to say to the youth about to enter into your field.
AD : I do. RUN! Get the hell away from here! Save yourselves! RUN you ****ing idiots! This place is cursed!
Apt Meter : WARNING! WARNING! RED ALERT! RED ALERT! RED ALERT!
Dawwg : Oh hell! What now?
AD : No idea! I never got how this thing works exactly. Is it like a censor board or something?
Apt Meter : This interview will self destruct in 10 seconds.
Dawwg : **** MAN! I don’t wanna die!
AD : See you in hell dude. Don’t forget your ID and matching tie.