The anniversary interview

Dawwg : Sup y’all! This is T Dawwg, with 2 Ws. I’m back with another interview but this time not with a sociopath, but with a dude who just finished one year in his IT company yesterday. Congratulations anniversary dude!



Anniversary Dude : No way I’m having such a long name!


AD : That’s better!


Dawwg : So tell me mah man, how did it feel like when you completed one year as an IT professional?


AD : It felt like I completed one year as an IT professional, what did you expect me to say? It feels ‘wet’?


Dawwg : uuuuuhh.......


Censor meter : Warning! Yellow alert! Yellow alert!


Dawwg : Ahem...so what made da biggest impact on you during the days of your training?


AD : When I was hit by a moving cycle.


Dawwg : When yo?


AD : When I staring at a girl wearing short shorts standing in the middle of the road.


Censor meter : Warning! Yellow alert! Yellow alert!


Dawwg : So where did you have your ha-ppi-est moment while in training?


AD : Like most people, in the multiplex.


Dawwg : The occasion?


AD : When Drona was over.


Dawwg : Do you miss the feel of your training days?


AD : Not really, I still got exams and I still flunk in most of them so ‘the feel’ is still pretty much there.


Dawwg : What is the one thing in life the past one year?


AD : Live


Dawwg : You paint a grim picture man!


AD : And you ask several stupid questions but do I complain?


Dawwg : So how did you end up here, exactly one year ago?


AD : I was actually an inventor. I invented pockets but only later realised it was already invented. So I went for plan B which was to join this company in case my invention fails.


Dawwg : So that is how you got here huh?


AD : No, I got ‘here’ by walking through that door back there.


Dawwg : I’m tired of this sh*t! How about we spice things up a notch with the question?


AD : Is that supposed to intimidate me or impress me, because I just feel bored.


Dawwg : Tell me about your relationships huh?


AD : Well, there was this one great girl, she was sweet and friendly, at the same time sexy looking! The chemistry was undeniable...


Dawwg : Alrite! My boy’s in da game eh!


AD : I meant between the girl and her fiancé. They get married next year by the way.


Dawwg : Tough luck man! I’m sure you will....


AD : ....kill someone just because I’m bored?


Apt Meter : Warning! Warning! Orange alert! Orange alert! Orange alert!


Dawwg : ...........


AD : ..............


Dawwg : .......find someone else.


AD : I already did.


Dawwg : Really?


AD : Of course not idiot! Do I look depressed to you? I’m single!


Dawwg : Are you advertising in my interview?


AD : Oh god! Please don’t tell me you are interested!


Apt Meter : Warning! Warning! Orange alert! Orange alert! Orange alert!


Dawwg : So this is what you’ve become? After one year you are a bitter sarcastic shell of a man.


AD : With hints of God complex.


Dawwg : Is there anything else you’d like to say to the youth about to enter into your field.


AD : I do. RUN! Get the hell away from here! Save yourselves! RUN you ****ing idiots! This place is cursed!


Apt Meter : WARNING! WARNING! RED ALERT! RED ALERT! RED ALERT!


Dawwg : Oh hell! What now?


AD : No idea! I never got how this thing works exactly. Is it like a censor board or something?


Apt Meter : This interview will self destruct in 10 seconds.


Dawwg : **** MAN! I don’t wanna die!


AD : See you in hell dude. Don’t forget your ID and matching tie.


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